Here are some jokes hoping you like them BOY: Can I hold your hand? GIRL : No thanks, it isnt heavy.
GIRL : Say you love me! Say you love me! BOY : You love me...
GIRL : If we become engaged will you give me a ring?? BOY : Sure, whats your phone number??
MAN : You remind me of the sea.
WOMAN : Because Im wild, romantic and exciting? MAN : NO, because you make me sick.
WIFE : You tell a man something, it goes in one ear and comes out of the other. HUSBAND : You tell a woman something: It goes in both ears and comes out of the mouth.
MARY : John says Im pretty. Andy says Im ugly.What do u think, Peter? PETER : A bit of both. I think youre pretty ugly.
Teacher : "Which is more important to us, the sun or the moon?" Pupil : "The moon". Teacher : "Why?" Pupil : "The moon gives us light at night when we need it but the sun gives us light only in the day time when we dont need it".
Teacher : "What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?" Pupil : "A teacher".
Waiter : "Would you like your coffee black?" Customer : "What other colors do you have?" Teacher : "Sam, you talk a lot !" Sam : "Its a family tradition". Teacher : "What does that mean?" Sam : "Sir, my grandpa was a street hawker, my father is a teacher". Teacher : "What about your mother?" Sam : "Shes a woman".
Teacher : "Now, children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him, what virtue would I be showing?" Student : "Brotherly love".
Teacher : "Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating?" Sam : "No sir, I dont have to, my mom is a good cook".
Patient : "What are the chances of my recovering doctor?" Doctor : "One hundred percent. Medical records show that nine out of ten people die of the disease you have. Yours is the tenth case Ive treated. The others all died".
Teacher : " Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?"
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Student : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day and at the same time."